let me assure you lemon, dennis duffy is not your true loverating.
liz lemon, jack donaghy, dennis duffy, liz's sandwichesspoilers/warnings.
vague spoilers for both seasons, specific ones for 2.12 "the subway hero"summary. very few things in the world make liz happier than proving jack donaghy wrongdisclaimer.
i don't own any of this, it belongs to tina, nbc and other people with more creatively than myselfa/n.
written for aphrodite_mine
's birthday, who required liz/sandwich, i hope you like it sweetie, even though i did put a fair bit of jack into it.
“Lemon, I simply do not understand your insistence in continuing a relationship with Dennis Duffy.”
As this is the third time Jack has mentioned his disapproval since she had retreated to the “on” part of her “on-again, off-again” relationship with Dennis, she feels she shouldn’t be as defensive about her relationship.
“There’s nothing wrong with Dennis, Jack, and he likes me.”
“’Nothing wrong’ seems to be too broad of a statement.”
(Except for that one time he wanted to fake throwing her in front of a subway at the Rockefeller station, and to be honest, she isn’t sure what “fake” entailed – although knowing Dennis it probably included going down under the tracks.)
“He hasn’t threatened my life in at least six months, and he makes me happy.”
“Makes you happy how? Emotionally? Sexually? Gastricly?”
“Eww, Jack, I’m not discussing my sex life with you.”
“Lemon, you’re avoiding the question.”
“All of them.”
“You’re a horrible liar, Lemon. Bringing up your sex life means that he quite clearly not satisfying you in bed –”
“– Having had the pleasure of Dennis’s company, I can guarantee he’s not emotionally satisfying, which leaves only one option left, and honestly, Lemon, has your happiness always been ruled by your stomach?”
And as much as she’d like to say Jack is wrong (very few things in the world make Liz happier than proving Jack Donaghy wrong), when she ran to the airport after Floyd, she basically chose her Teamster’s sandwich over him, and most (all right, ALL) of her fondest memories of Dennis definitely involve food.
“No. My relationship with Floyd had nothing to do with food.” Which is true in a way – the chocolate covered cherries she ate that one night weren’t really for her and just because he appreciated her desire to have Sabor de Soledad at all times of the night does not mean their relationship was strictly about food.
“You must realize your statement implies that all your other relationships have.”
“It does not.”
“If I offered you meatball sandwiches with extra bread for the rest of your life, would you marry me?”
“Would you really – what, no! I wouldn’t marry you!”
“Lemon, you will never convince me that you think with anything other than your stomach, especially when it comes to love.”
Liz considers her past relationships, and as painful as it might be to admit (and let’s be honest, she doesn’t like admitting anything to Jack), he might have a point.
“You’re probably right, Jack. I’ll just have to trust my gut. HA!”
Apparently Jack doesn’t have love of lame puns, a quality she finds rather unfortunate.
“Would you seriously buy me meatball sandwiches with extra bread if I married you?”
“Gesh, it’s a joke, Jack. I could buy my own meatball sandwiches with extra bread using your money if we got married.”
Jack groans, and Liz just smiles – because he’s sort of right, she probably would marry him for meatball sandwiches with extra bread. But only for the sandwiches.Feedback is love!